Ever walked into someone’s house only to find it’s full of stuff, making it look messy and untidy? Just as physical things can bring disorder to our homes, emotional turmoil can bring clutter and a lack of clarity to your life. And that can seriously affect your mental health.
Emotional clutter is the psychological version of that bursting-at-the-seams closet. You can close the door but the mess is still inside, and the things that have outstayed their purpose can drain your energy, crowd your mental space and create barriers to moving forward. It can be a bit sneaky – seemingly innocent but silently weighing you down like a pair of concrete boots.
The more you let go of the things that are no longer working hard for you, the more room you’ll make for the things that do. Here are some of the things that can emotionally clutter your life – and how to say goodbye to them for good and start a mindfulness journey that’s all about self-care.
One-sided friendships and toxic relationships drain the essence of you, and in the process you start to become more like them. In fact, motivational speaker Jim Rohn once famously said that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. That’s because those people shape who you are. They determine what conversations dominate your attention. They affect the attitudes and behaviours you are regularly exposed to. Eventually you start to think like they think and behave like they behave.
When you think about the five people you spend the most time with, try to describe them using just five words. If the words are bad, it’s time to say goodbye to that relationship. Get out and meet new people. Hit the delete key on the ones who are weighing you down. If you’re in a bad relationship, seek advice to help you uncouple so you can move forward.
The struggle for perfection
Some days you spring out of bed 5 minutes before the alarm goes off, ready to face the day with fierce determination - and you’re so good you’re practically on fire. Other days it’s a struggle to get out of bed and you somehow only just manage to get through the day without causing serious mishap to yourself or others.
Whatever type of day you’re having – it’s ok. You’re doing great. You might not be perfect at what you’re doing right now, but that’s fine. You can be perfect after lunch or when you get home.
Nothing brings emotional clutter into your life more than indecision. Sitting on the fence. Standing still. Whatever it is, doing nothing is often worse than making a bad decision and getting it wrong. Getting it wrong can be great – because you learn from the experience and move on, whereas the “what if’s” of inaction will keep you bogged down forever.
It’s scary out there
Sometimes you want to make a change but it’s hard to be brave. It’s easier to say no to something or to retreat to what you know rather than stepping out of your comfort zone. It can be scary when you’re perched on the edge of yes or no, stop or go – but take the chance. Whatever it is, don’t let fear stop you from trying new things, meeting new people or experiencing more of what life has to offer.
We’ve all got those friends who just seem more perfect than us. They always look great, say the right things, manage a successful career and have a wide circle of friends. It’s easy to fade into the background and feel unimportant when exposed to their shining star but just keep going. Don’t try to be them, just focus on being the best you that you can – be open, honest, trustworthy and generous with your time and people will gravitate towards you.
Always remember that some people will love you and some people couldn’t care less about you. Stay close to the ones you love, see if there’s anything you can learn from those you don’t, and then move on.
We’re constantly bombarded with thoughts throughout the day, and the best things in life can live or die with a thought. You’re in the driving seat here so choose the thoughts that give you wings and ditch the thoughts that hold you back.
If emotional clutter really is weighing you down and you’d like some professional help, there are plenty of self-care programs available that will help you become the mindful superstar you know you are.
Don’t worry if your finances won’t quite stretch to it (that’s more emotional clutter right there!) – we’re here to help. Just check out our mini-loans to find out how quick and easy it is to get your hands on some extra funds. Once a loan is approved, we can usually deposit the cash into your bank account within a few hours - so you can start de-cluttering your life and start heading towards your mindfulness journey!